Down to the Last Detail

Hey, y’all! It’s Tori taking over Unwrapping for the day! :)

While I have tried to refrain from diagnosing myself with Postpartum Anxiety (PPA) since welcoming my baby girl earlier this year, I am aware that I have found myself feeling more anxious than I ever did before bringing a little person into this world. Some days, my anxiety shows up in the form of staring at her monitor for hours at night while she’s sleeping just to make sure she’s okay (where are my new moms at?!); other days my anxious thoughts leave me questioning myself. Am I a good enough mom? Does my baby know how loved she is?

I get it, I’m a new mom and that’s what new moms do, right? Yeah, that’s what I thought, too, until I heard God’s voice stop me one day and say, “Did I not give this gift to you? Was she not mine before she was yours?” My anxiety was beginning to have more of an impact than I had realized and was becoming crippling to a degree that is not only unhealthy for me, but also unhealthy for the child I am raising. Even in this, I found myself responding to God with, “But, but…I just have to make sure she has this, and has that, and that I’m the best mom ever.”

As in love as I am with my baby girl, I unfortunately cannot boast that I know the number of hairs on her head, that I knew her before she was in my womb, or that I was crucified so that she may live a life of freedom. The Holy Spirit has so gently and graciously reminded me that there is no match for His love, and beyond that, my sweet girl is well taken care of and it’s not because of me. What might you be stressing to take care of on your own because you think you can do it better than God? I challenge you to let Him take care of it. I can promise you He does a pretty marvelous job.