Belief Restored.

When my brother went on, albeit sudden, I was grateful to have a few short days prior with him at the hospital, along with my family and loved ones.

While all together, with his fate looming over us, the only thing that kept us together was prayer.

And when I say we prayed, I mean we had prayer leaders on speaker phone, we pulled in nurses to the prayer circle, we turned the entire ICU room into our prayer sanctuary and asked in every-way we could for God to bring him through.

So, when he went on, you can understand not just my grief, but my disappointment in that my prayers weren’t answered.

And for me, that has been one of the hardest realities to face through the grieving process, along with the rollercoaster of emotions; is that I believed in His power, yet my prayers weren’t answered.

But, over time and after looking within, I realized belief is not about what we want, because ultimately we are not in control. What we are in control of though, is how we perceive and use the fruits of our beliefs.

So, at first glance, yes I was devastated about losing my brother, but now I realize through my overall belief in Him, that there is a purpose and plan deeper than I could imagine.

For my brother that meant peace and stillness from the struggles he had encountered in his short life. Struggles he could no longer bare, and because I believe He knew that, no matter how hard,

my belief has since been restored.